Let me know what YOU think :)

Hello everyone! I’ve been working on improving my writing, and I have had a lot of help from my friend who I get to see quite often. Her writing is even better than mine, and she’s been a great help helping me to conquer two-paragraph chapters. Besides making my paragraphs longer, I’ve incorporated a few plot twists, and this story has kind of a surprise end. To get the whole idea, I’m posting the first two chapters. Pls let me know what you think. Thanks! ūüėÄ
 Chapter 1:
¬† ¬†“Emma! Please take out the trash.” Emma’s mom called from the kitchen.
¬† ¬†“Yes Mom.” Emma responded.
Grabbing the trash bag from the kitchen, she walked happily to the laundry room door. From there she bounded through the garage. Her mother had set up a grow light in one of the corners for her plants. Even though spring had arrived a couple months before, the nights were still cold enough to chill a person to the bone. Well, not really. Her mom was so busy with other chores to put it away.
¬† ¬†It gave just enough light for Emma to see where she stepped. Struggling to open the old door, she finally had to set the bag down. As she got the door open, sunlight radiated in, making the grow light’s light seem very dim and pointless.
   Skipping toward the trash can, she smiled. Emma loved spring, and today was a perfect day for taking a walk, going for a picnic by the lake, or flying kites. A gentle breeze whipped her long, golden brown hair in front of her eyes. Laughing, she brushed the strands aside, and watched a butterfly fly by. It seemed the perfect spring day in all her twelve years of life.
¬† ¬†“Oh, I almost forgot! I’m here to throw out the trash.” She giggled, finally throwing the bag in the green bin.
¬† ¬†Her task complete, she hesitated to go inside. The warm sun was beckoning her to stay and the cool air felt so good to her, but she ran back inside, remembering that if her siblings and her finished their chores on time, they could go the the park and fly kites, Emma’s favorite spring activity.
   Emma, as you already may have noticed, is twelve, the second oldest in the Anderson family. Her older sister, May, age sixteen, is away at high school. After Emma is her younger brother, Judah, almost eight. And there was little Mary, four years old. And the baby of the family, Isabella, or Bella, not quite one yet.
   As Emma skipped back in the house, he mom called to her.
¬† ¬†“Em, please go check on Bella. And clean your room, don’t just shove your toys in a corner.” Her mom smiled.
¬† ¬†“Sure. But can I get Mary to help me?” Emma shared her room with her younger sister, something she didn’t like that much.
¬† ¬†“Yes, but help her. She’s only four. And make sure you’ve done all your chores. I know you want to go fly kites, but we also need to get ready for Sabbath.”
¬† ¬†“Alright.” Emma sighed.
¬† ¬†The Anderson family had recently become Seventh-Day Adventists. Mr. and Mrs. Anderson and their kids were very happy, all except May. Being away at high school when her family made this big change, she hadn’t understood why.
                                                             ~<()>~
   May, the oldest of the Anderson children, hurried to class. Panting, she caught up with her best friend, Ruth.
¬† ¬†“Hurry, or we’ll be late!” Ruth shouted.
¬† ¬†“Ok.” May panted along with her. “Are you ready for the quiz?”
¬† ¬†“Definitely not!” Ruth whispered as they slipped into class.
¬† ¬†“Miss Anderson, Miss Martin, nice of you to join us.” Mr. Hunter, their english teacher was very strict. “Please stay after class.”
The girls blushed, and quickly sat down.
   After class, May and Ruth walked to their room to study.
¬† ¬†“I’m so ready for a free weekend!” Ruth said.
¬† ¬†“Me too! I love weekends!” May replied.
   Opening their room door, May and Ruth plopped their massive piles of homework onto their beds.
¬† ¬†“Ugh! I’ll never get why they give us so much homework!” May flopped down on her belly. “I wish their was an easier way to finish our homework without spending hours on it. And if I don’t finish all of the ones introducing new concepts, I’ll never pass the exam.”
¬† ¬†“Well, I’ve been thinking…” Ruth mischievously smiled.
¬† ¬†“Uh oh! I know that look.” May giggled.
¬† ¬†“Well, what if we take turns studying. I mean, for the english exam you’ll study, and if I need an answer, you slip me a note with my shoe. And for the next exam, I’ll study, and help you with whatever you need to know.” Ruth said.
¬† ¬†“But…”
¬† ¬†“But nothing! Or even better, I’ll study half, and you’ll study the other half.” Ruth smirked. “Besides, if I don’t pass, I’ll be grounded for half the summer!”
¬† ¬†“I’m not so sure…”
¬† ¬†“Please! I’ll help you too! We’ll both pass if we help each other!” Ruth persisted.
¬† ¬†“Why can’t we try and get the answers. We’ll sneak into Mr. Hunter’s office, and get the answers.” May said.
¬† ¬†“You know after almost the entire tenth grade class cheated, all the teachers keep their papers locked up.” Ruth replied. “Even in the other grades.”
¬† ¬†“Well, alright.” May wasn’t so sure.
Chapter 2:
¬† ¬†Judah and Mary jumped beside Bella’s car seat, and Emma climbed in behind them, carrying their kites. Her mom buckled Bella in the car seat, and checked Mary’s ¬†seatbelt. Amidst the chaos, for that is what you get when you put three happy children in the back of a car on the way to fly kites, Mrs. Anderson climbed in the driver seat and set a basket on the seat beside her, full of sandwiches, juice boxes, water bottles, and some apples. Also, she brought the diaper bag full of the sort of things you need when you have a baby to care for.
¬† ¬†“Now, we can only stay there for a couple hours. Your dad will meet us there when he gets off from work.” Their mom informed them.
   Emma watched the clouds pass by. She loved gazing at the blue sky on a warm, spring day. She glanced at her watch.
¬† ¬†“Only four.” She said out loud. But no one heard her, for her younger siblings were trying to yodel. They came up with the weirdest ideas. For instance, one time Judah tried to fly by taking some paper, and taping it to his arms. He then climbed onto a big rock in the garden, and jumped off. It did not end well.
   She traced the design on the watch with her finger. On her eighth birthday, Mrs. Martin, her best friends mom had given it to her. Her mind whirled with memories. Soon after that, Mrs. Martin had gotten cancer and passed away. Natalie, her best friend, still missed her mom a lot.
¬† ¬†I hope nothing ever happens to my parents. At least Natalie’s aunt moved in to help with housework. Her dad is always working.
   Her mind wandered for the rest of the drive, until her moms announcement that they had arrived broke the reverie.
                                                            ~<()>~
   Mr. Anderson glanced worriedly at the ticking clock mounted on the wall of his office. Pretty soon it would be sunset. Suddenly, his boss called him into his office.
¬† ¬†“John, I know about your beliefs, but if you could take over the computer programming for a few months, starting tonight, until we find someone new, I’ll give you a raise.”
¬† ¬†Mr. Anderson remained steadfast. “I’m sorry, sir, but I cannot work on my
Sabbath.”
¬† ¬†His boss wouldn’t give up. “But a few months ago, you wouldn’t have cared!”
¬† ¬†“Sir, I have found the truth. Forget about the raise.” He replied.
¬† ¬†“But I need you to take over for a few days. You’re the only one who would quality for the job.”
¬† ¬†“How about Andrew Martin? He could use the extra work.” Mr. Anderson suggested.
¬† ¬†“Well, I’ll consider. But you’re letting down a lot of money. If you change your mind, come and see me.”
¬† ¬†Mr. Anderson hesitated. “Um, sir, it’s nearly my Sabbath. May I leave now?”
¬† ¬†“This time, I’ll let you go. You’re one of my best workers, though. I hate to see you losing your mind.” His boss sighed.
                                                                   ~<()>~
Mr. Jones, Mr. Anderson’s boss drove home, muttering. He didn’t notice the spectacular sunset, he didn’t notice the beautiful flowers, he didn’t notice anything. His mind whirled with anger.
¬† ¬†I can’t believe John is mixed up in this crazy mess of Sabbath-keeping Christians. Come to think of it, all Christians are crazy. I just wish he would cooperate.
   Arriving home, he unlocked the door to his house.
¬† ¬†“Maria, where is my wife?” He snapped, walking through the enormous living room.
¬† ¬†“The missus is upstairs.” Maria, the maid almost dropped the gilded bowls she was washing at the spotless sink. Her master was not in a good mood.
¬† ¬†“With Anthony? Is he doing better?” Concern for his only son brought a kind look over his face.
¬† ¬†“No, I will call the doctor if you think we need to. Maybe you should go check on him.” She replied.
¬† ¬†“Just call the doctor. He’s been sick for a week, now. I’m really worried about him.”
Hurrying up the spiral staircase, he ran into his seven year old son’s bedroom.
¬† ¬†“Oh, honey! You’re here! He’s still sick. It isn’t too bad, but it’s been a week!” Mrs. Jones said.
¬† ¬†“Maria is calling the doctor. I’ll go see if we should bring him in for a checkup.” Mr. Jones replied.
¬† ¬†“No, I’ll go check, and you go change. You’re still wearing your suit.”
¬† ¬†“Ok.” He said, dashing out of the room.
                                                                      ~<()>~
As Emma finished her sandwich, she saw her dad’s car driving up the hill.
¬† ¬†“Daddy’s here!” Mary exclaimed.
They all ran to meet him.
¬† ¬†“Did you have any trouble getting off?” His wife asked.
¬† ¬†“Well, a little, but I’m glad I’m off now.” He grinned. “I’m hungry! Is there anything left?”
¬† ¬†“Well, we saved a little.” Judah teased.
¬† ¬†“There’s plenty.” His wife assured him.
¬† ¬†“Can we fly our kites again?” Mary asked.
¬† ¬†“Sure, but get your siblings to help you.” Mrs. Anderson replied.
Emma enjoyed the rest of the evening. When her parents told them it was time to go, even baby Bella started to cry.
¬† ¬†“Come on, kids! We need to go to sleep so we can wake up on time for church!” Her dad said.
   Kids, kites, empty water bottles and all were hauled into the car, and as it began to get dark, the drove down the hill, and back home.

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