Failure | Chapter 8

Alex grabbed another makeup remover wipe and stared at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were red, black mascara was smudged, even some foundation had started falling with her tears. She closed her eyes, reliving the events that had crushed her heart. She didn’t understand why it was so hard on her. Everyone has exes, but it hurt that her roommate would keep that. Not to mention her boyfriend.
Now it all makes sense, Alex thought, grabbing another wipe. Louise was upset with Alex because she was dating her ex. Also, she was upset at James for being so cruel, which was why she ran out crying that kids had been mean to her.
Adalyn knocked on the bathroom door. “You ok?” She asked.
“Yeah…” Alex opened the bathroom door.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Alex looked down and sighed. “Yeah, it’s unavoidable.”
“Just pour out your feelings. I’m here to listen.”
~ ~ ~
Next morning, at breakfast, Alex and Adalyn sat together eating cereal. Madelyn hadn’t woken up yet, so she wasn’t going to make it for breakfast.
James walked over. “Hey Adalyn, could I talk to Alex alone for a little bit?”
Adalyn looked at Alex for approval, and when Alex nodded, Adalyn grabbed her tray and sat with some other friends.
“James… let me say something first. I just want to apologize for overreacting to the situation last night. It was a shock that two of the closest people in my life would keep something from me. I was upset because we had the ‘ex talk’ but you never mentioned her. I told you about Brad, so why didn’t you tell me about Louise?”
James scratched at a dent in the table. “Look, I practically forgot about the whole ‘Louise and I’ thing. We kinda liked each other for a year, but it didn’t last.”
James stopped fiddling with the table and looked into Alex’s eyes. “Please don’t break up with me. I really do love you.”
Alex looked away and sighed. “I love you too… but I’m just so stressed out right now. I’m not officially breaking up with you, but I do wanna take a break. Let’s just take a three week break, alright?”
“School will almost be over by then,” James sighed. “But alright.”
~ ~ ~
Alex put on her school uniform and walked to class. Her first class was Bible. She paid attention sometimes, but usually let her mind wonder. This time, she tried to pay more attention.
“Alright, class, let’s learn about Noah’s ark. Now I would assume you all know a good amount about Noah, right?” The teacher asked.
The class stayed quiet but everyone nodded, everyone except Alex. The teacher didn’t point that out, as the teacher hadn’t seen that Alex didn’t know. But Alex thought about how much she had to learn about Christianity. I’m going to a Christian academy… I should learn more about it. And with that, she decided she was going to read the Bible. Now she had more free time since her and James were taking a break.
~ ~ ~
“Hey Louise… sorry for freaking out the other day…” Alex apologized.
Louise said nothing. Alex sighed. “Louise…”
“What?” She asked sharply.
“Are you ok?”
“Oh yeah I’m great. I was hurt at banquet night but my ‘best friend’ didn’t even notice. She was too busy freaking out about the fact that her boyfriend used to be my boyfriend. I wonder why I’m hurt.”
Alex sighed.
“You know, when you first came, I was so jealous. I had finally worked through all those issues when you had to go and reopen them, and when you reopened them, you didn’t even think about me!” Louise exclaimed angrily. “Go back to Adalyn’s dorm. I don’t want you in here.”
“JUST LEAVE!” Louise shouted. Alex took a step back. She sighed and packed her things. That would be the last conversation of Louise and Alex for the year.
~ ~ ~
Alex sighed as she walked into Adalyn and Madelyn’s dorm room. “Adalyn…”
“Adalyn is gone…” Madelyn moaned, rubbing her eyes.
“Oh, hi Madelyn! I was wondering, could I stay here for a few nights?”
“Louise is mad at you?” Madelyn asked.
“How did you know?”
“Tea spills a lot in this school, you should know.”
“Tea…?” Alex asked, apprehensively.
“It’s a saying, I guess.”
Alex shrugged. “Do  you think I did the wrong thing?”
“That’s none of my business.” Madelyn mussed.
“Well you know so much about my ‘tea’ apparently.”
Madelyn laughed. “You’re cute. Um, I doubt I would’ve done anything differently besides not freak out.”
“That’s basically all I did…”
“Well then I guess I would have done everything differently. Your boyfriend didn’t just date you, and I’m sure you’ve had other boyfriends besides him.”
Alex sighed. “Well, it wasn’t really official, but-”
“Exactly. Louise and James didn’t have that great of a relationship. Don’t worry about it.”
“I guess you’re right. I have to study for math, finals are coming soon.”
“I’ll just wing them.”
“How is it that you get good grades but never study?”
“I guess I have a good memory.” Madelyn shrugged.
Alex grunted. She sat down and looked at her math homework, but her mind was far from it. She sighed and put it away for now. She grabbed her phone and realized that Trisha had texted, but she decided to ignore it. I’ll check it later. Then she looked at the Bible app she had downloaded a while ago, but had never opened. She clicked the explore button. “How are you feeling?” It said, which four emojis. A happy face, an angry face, a sad face, and a scared face. Alex chose the sad face. Then other options showed up.
“Ashamed, Depressed, Discouraged, Forgotten, Hopeless, Hurt, Lonely, Sad, Sick, Tired?”
Alex thought about it. Kind of ashamed, not really depressed, definitely discouraged, not really forgotten, kind of hopeless, very hurt, not really lonely, kind of sad, not sick… yet, and tired.
Alex decided to choose the discouraged option. One verse particularly stuck out to her.
“And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful.” Colossians 3:15, NKJV. She edited it on to a picture and put it on her phone’s wallpaper.
An hour later, Alex was now working on her math. Adalyn walked in the dorm. “Hey Alex! What are you still doing here?”
Alex told Adalyn what had happened, and Adalyn was shocked. “Wow, Louise is so sensitive. Of course you’d be upset! You have a right to be! How does she have a right to be all extra?”
“Honestly, I’m done with her for now.” Alex sighed.
“I feel ya.” Adalyn agreed.
“Hey, I wanted to ask you, what church do you go to?”
“I go to a Baptist church. What about you?”
“Honestly, I’m looking for a denomination to join. My mom admires Christians for being upstanding citizens and such, but she doesn’t really care about the Bible or God.”
“Well if you want to be a Christian, you totally should. I’m sure you could find someone to give you a ride, church members are always wiling to lend a hand. Also, your mom would probably be happy about that since you would have certain rules to follow, or whatever.”
“Yeah I think so too. Is being a Baptist nice? Would you recommend it?”
“Umm… I mean it’s different for each church and it depends on what you really believe but I like it.”
Alex smiled. “Maybe I just will look into that.”
~ ~ ~
Alex sat in her room. It felt good to be back in her own house, just relaxing in summer. She was watching a YouTube video, preparing for having to ask her mom if she could get baptized in the Baptist just 3 minutes away from her house. She replayed what the conversation would be like in her head. I’ve been getting Bible studies at the Baptist church right by us… it’s literally 3 minutes away! And I was wondering if I could get baptized there. I don’t see what would be wrong with it. I would just go on Sunday, I’d go there at 9:45 a.m. and come back at around 1 p.m., which really isn’t that long. Plus maybe you could go on a date with your boyfriend while I’m at church, or even better you could come with me. I would have to be a ‘good girl’ of some sorts, to be a Baptist, so that would make you happier. You’ve always admired Christians so-
“Hey Alex, what are you watching?”
“I’m just watching how to make galaxy slime. Mom, I’ve been meaning to ask you something. Could… I…”
“Spill it, Alex. I came here to be friendly but if you are going to play this game I’m going to leave.”
“Can I be baptized into the Baptist church?” Alex blurted out.
“Sure!” Alex’s mom said. “I was hoping you’d become a Christian by going to that academy. They are some of the best people I’ve known. I mean, not all of them, but for the most part they are just great people in the world.”
“Well, thanks so much Mom! You should come too-”

“No Alex. I like Christians, but I’m not going to become one. I’ve got enough problems on my plate, and I don’t need to be reminded every week about how many sins I’ve committed.” With that Alex’s mom left the room.
GUYYSSSSSSSS I have been killing the writing lately. Not that I’ve been writing well, but I’ve been writing a lot of stories. And I have a big announcement…
This is the second to last chapter of Failure! So next week I’m going to be posting the ending chapter of Failure! Don’t worry though, this isn’t the end, because this is going to be a Trilogy. Also, for those wondering, the Bible app Alex was using is by YouVersion. It’s great, I’d definitely recommend it.
Alright, thanks for reading! Bye!

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Failure | Chapter 8

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