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TOPIC: My testimony

My testimony 2 months 3 weeks ago #129919

My past couple weeks have been very difficult and awful. Riddled with family and friend problems. I’d been feeling like nothing but a big disappointment. Friday evening consisted of me breaking off all contact with someone I cared about a lot.

On Saturday morning I’d caused my mom to cry and my dad got real angry. I yelled in their face that I wanted to die, to leave. I rushed into my room crying, the emotions and thoughts overwhelming me.

Laying in bed, I did the thing I’d done multiple times in the past. I tried to knock myself out, the thought had been playing with me for a while again, but I had not yet had a lapse.

Suicidal thoughts have been a part of me since I was eight, but I never went through in any of those attempts and I am glad I did not again. It had been several months, maybe even a year since my last huge meltdown/

I’d been praying, crying, and screaming, when it snapped to me that I was being stupid. Again. I got up, and went to make breakfast. Quietly going about my business, I was screaming and crying inwardly.

After my mom insisted I eat something, I logged onto my writers community. I began looking through my notifications, and at the top it said: Encouragement for Hannah K

A bunch of my friends had written notes into a document to encourage me. It was sent to me no more than five minutes before.

Notes such as these awaited me:

Hi Hannah K, I want you to know that you are never far from my mind or my prayers. I want you to know that we all love and care about you so so much.

Hannah girl,
You are so very special! Never let Satan tell you otherwise.
You are God's child He created you for a purpose. And His love for you is never ending.

Hello hello Hannah III! I would say I know you are going through a hard time…but that is obvious. You’re really going through some tough stuff.............
Just know I’m right here, whenever you need me. This time will pass, and It will be okay........

I burst into tears, I cannot describe how I felt. It was as if God told them that I was at my lowest point at the moment and that I needed it. Normally these type of documents were sent on Mondays, so that the people had all weekend to write their notes.

The person who they’d chose to sent me the document had lost a fourteen year old brother to suicide the year before and it really woke me up.

I cannot thank God for giving me friends and people who cared so much for me.

Writers Block: When your imaginary friends refuse to talk to you.

YouTube Channels:

Stories of Faith: www.youtube.com/channel/UCudEpP-KJhonYokRNIMC6pg
Kute Kitties: www.youtube.com/channel/UCWEvdHXKaaITP_cGYgBRYaw
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My testimony 2 months 3 weeks ago #129930

  • JoyBaker
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  • Psalm 145:3
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Wow. God’s timing really is perfect.
I’ll keep you in my prayers

Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.
Psalm 145:3
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My testimony 2 months 2 weeks ago #129956

  • sci_geeek
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Jesus is amazing!! We love you so much, writergirl. Thanks so much for opening up, I know how hard that can be. I'll keep you in my prayers.
melancholic/sanguine ~ infp 4 ~ rluan

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old soul, free spirit, and moderate pluviophile

"what's past is prologue." - william shakespeare
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